i'm done!!! all my exams..

je suis fini!!

sweetness.

home i come!!!!

see you all back there :)

Love & Hate of Exams

..exams make me grumpy
..exams make me sad
..exams make me mad
..exams make me frustated
..exams make me insane
..exams make me angry
..exams make me bitchy
..exams make me nervous
..exams make me anxious
..exams make me MOODY

..exams make me feel sick
..exams make my stomach pains worse
..exams make me OD on tylenol 3
..exams make me get the flu
..exams make my body ache all over
..exams make my shoulder & back hurt.. :(
..exams make my sleep patterns go wacked
..exams make me tired
..exams make me sleepy
..exams make me have to survive on 3 hr sleep daily
..exams make me OD on sleeping pills

..exams make me lose weight (in a bad way)
..exams make me gain weight .. how the losing + gaining @ the same time works?? is way beyond me!
..exams make me waste $ on eating out
..exams make me a can food addict
..exams make vegetables/fruit non-existent
..exams make me have junk food cravings
..exams make me my buy LOADS of junk food
..exams make me a Coca-Cola Addict

..exams make me messy
..exams make my room a pig sty
..exams make my closet a random mess
..exams make my already big stack of dirty laundry EVEN HUGER
..exams make my desk unorganized
..exams make my carpet stain filled
..exams make my pens go missing
..exams make my stack of dirty dishes as high as the ceiling
..exams make my room smell nasty
..exams make me LAZY
..exams make me forget to clean the fish tank (it really smells!! & the water is cloudy.. ewww )

..exams make me get bad marks
..exams make me fail
..exams make me feel insuperior
..exams make me dumb
..exams make me useless
..exams tell me i have no idea what i'm doing
..exams tell me i dunt know anything
..exams tell me i sux @ the oboe
..exams tell me i can't finger-pick on the guitar
..exams tell me i can't sight sing, sight read, or sight clap rhythms
..exams tell me im in the wrong program

..exams make me lose hope
..exams make me lose faith
..exams make me give up
..exams make me wanna be a drug addict
..exams make me wanna be an alcoholic

..exams make me miss home
..exams make me wanna go home
..exams make me miss home made food
..exams make me miss my friends
..exams make me antisocial
..exams make me miss going out on weekends


HOWEVER, on a brighter note

..exams mean i can go home soon
..exams mean i can go Christmas shopping soon
..exams mean the semester is so close to over
..exams mean the year is almost over
..exams mean CHRISTMAS is soon
..exams mean Christmas decorations
..exams mean Christmas gifts are arriving
..exams mean decorating the family Christmas tree
..exams mean Christmas Dinners are soon
..exams mean Christmas get-to-gethers are in less than 2 weeks
..exams mean fattening up on the yummy food soon

..exams mean New years is soon..exams mean New Years Celebrations!
..exams mean 2005 is less than 20 days away

..exams mean a new semester
..exams mean never taking those same courses again


man..the love & hate relationship of exams..i hate it when exams come.. but i'm so anxious and happy for them to be over

4 down.. 1 more to go

2pm train back to T.O on Saturday

Newmarket.. here i come
mommy & daddy.. here i come
home sweet home.. hopefully my fishie will find a home while i'm gone.. :(i hope they don't die :P


Christmas!!! I am anxiously awaiting your arrival!!!

cute lil candy snowmen ^.^

its beeen a while.. the last few weeks have been very confusing, yet also very enjoyable... strange yes .. i know

confusing: trying to rearrange my life.. straighthen things out. .figuring out what i've been doing wrong.. reprioritizng my activities..

i've had a sudden change in heart.. about many things.. i mean.. ive kinda tried to avoid certain things in my life.. just simply because i was afraid of what has happened, what might have happened, what would happen, what might happen.. and now that i look back on it.. sometimes i screwed up really badly.. and i didn't necessarily have to.. b/c of my fear, i couldn't see the logical answer..

and if i had.. i guess my life would have turned my differently.. i dunno whether for the better or for the worse tho.. i guess it doesn't really matter what the past is about.. a lot of things made me realise.. the past is the past.. ur mistakes in the past can't be changed.. u can however change how the future will be..

there are many things i kno that i need to work on:
having faith in myself
having faith in others
honesty
admitting that i'm wrong
dealing with $$$.. man i'm a chronic shop-a-holic.
relying on HIM
trusting HIM
having faith in HIM
loving HIM with all my heart
staying in the right path..
and the list could go on and on...

but on a brighter side..
life has been very enjoyable for the last little while.. at least in comparison to b4..

in so many ways.. ive realized that i've been blessed..
with a great family ^.^
with amazing friends :P
opportunities to DIE for!
just having "things".. basic necessities.. i realized how fortunate that i've been just to be able to grow up in the environment that i did. having food and clothing and water.. technology.. transportation.. loving family.. relatively healthy body with no serious medical problems or diseases.. I'm Grateful...

and i can't even tell u how long its been since i've felt that way.. i've always thought.. its not fair.. life is unfair.. y can some ppl live the perfect life.. have everything.. and why couldn't i have it?
why couldn't i have this?? and why couldn't i have that.. i always wanted more..

and i mean i still think that life's unfair and wut not.. but i've kind of learned to appreciate the things i have..

many times.. u dun realize how privileged u are.. until u see what life would be like otherwise... and its kinda sad that we only realize it afterwards.. but at least we do.. so i'm very grateful for everything that i have.. and i dun think i would trade it for anything..

ah.. so this past weekend.. awesome i say.. sweetness.. lots of fun.. was longer than expected.. even better..

thursday: both profs for the day were away.. so no classes.. took 5pm train into london.. had dinner with jo & her housemates.. went out for the night w/frankie.. saw james.. meet their housemates.. fun fun :)

friday: went to the nerdy music classes with elise :), then lcbo with jo.. haha.. good nite.. drinking.. and german ppl!! hehe.. sorrie for falling asleep.. went out to G.T's on richmond with alexa, andrea, and jo.. was fun. well except for the creepy asian dude.. haha

saturday: i woke up early again!!! 2 weeks in a row!!! mad shopping @ birch run.. met some pretty kewl western ppl.. OLDIES all the way!!! bought some new gear.. sweetness

3 new shirts
new pink tongue twisters by kswiss!! baby!!
some christmas gifts for ppl
man.. mad cheapness @ bath & body works
mad cheapness @ aeropostale
mad cheapness @ reeboks

dinner @ big boys.. haha.. mad oldies for 2 hours on the way home!! woohoo!! man i miss the oldies.. thanx.

sunday: slept in.. breakfast with the "alma" girls.. minus sarah..add layla.. fun fun.. good food.. cheap tho.. :) very happy

so good weekend :)

HOLY FUCK!!! i fuckin hate bell mobility!!!

they fuckin stole $101 from my account w/o my approval!! i had never ever signed up for pre-authorized payment with them!!! and they just stole it!!! they didn't even fuckin send me a bill for the $101!
FUCKIN BELL!!!

i swear.. bell business office is gonna get one hell of a beating tommorow morning!!! FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!!!!!!
the $ in my account.. i needed to pay stuff tommorow too!!!

FUCK FUCK
FUCK
FUCK FUCK
FUCK
FUCK FUCK
FUCK
FUCK FUCK FUCK
FUCK FUCK
FUCK

aah.. this wkend.. tho short.. and not as expected.. was still great :)

friday:

stupid damn ass train got in 45 mins late.. oh well..
korean bbq with 'rents.. yummi :P haven't had that since hk
dropped of @ mcbc
went to demetres with jo, cheryl, guy, peter, garway and tim.. hmmm.. yummi crepes.. thanx for coming out
went back to jo's house.. raptors game & pigging out.. ewww dessert alcohol.. gross!!!

saturday:

believe it or not.. i woke up @ 9am on a SATURDAY morning!!! ha!.
went to vaughan mills with jo and her mom..
meet up with my mom at 11ish

shopped around till around 4.. bought lots of goodies :) new roxy jacket, 2 sweatshirts, 1 sweater (pink) hehe, pants, pjs, skirt

afternoon tea with my mommie.. got my hair cut short.. wanna see??

drove mom 2 church.. picked up there by d and chris... got a pretty necklace.. wanna see?

went to pizza hut.. yummie

drove around till lepp got off work..

went to an interesting choice of destination... haha.. saw lepp make a fool of himself in the midst of about 50-60 strange men.. and like 10 women.. (thanx d & lepp for the drinks, & chris for just staying there :P )

went home

sunday:

woke up .. had bkfast with my mommi.. went to mcbc with her..
lunch with mom, dad, uncle joseph and auntie rosetta..
costco.. yeah i'm a costco member now!! haha
cell phone fixd...

OMG!!! i luv chinese stores & their discounts!!!!

went to fmp.. was gonna buy a new cell.. but then saw one of the stores had repair service.. so decided to check that out.. man.. $30 and my cell phone is now officially fixed and workign!!! ha! props to chinese ppl and their cheap prices!!!

compare $30 @ chinese place.. and over $100 with rogers techs.. boo urns on rogers

train home..

so i had a pretty good wkend.. cant wait till the next one @ western..

too tired to blog all bout this weekend.. 2 highlights

1. Demetres

2. Lepp making a fool of himself in public!!! "strip"

will blog more later..stay tuned

good morning.. good morning..

y the sudden jolly mood?? well..

its my day of legalization after all.. ha!! i'm finally 19
and continuing with tradition.. well at least from last year...

props to:

momi & daddi
ivan
miranda
tiff
maddie
tamara
6e
LL
Aimee
Sarah
Melissa
Faith
Sam
Jo
Leppo


i'm very excited this weekend.. hehe.. can't wait ... this weekend and next.. loads of fun

heres the lowdown..

friday: train home @ 2pm.. dinner with 'rents.. out with jo, and some mcbc'ers
saturday: shopping with mom..haircut.... dinner with mom.. out with leppo and cds ppl
sunday: mcbc.. lunch with ???... out for some fun with the fobbers.. 7pm train back to the ghetto

next weekend:
friday: train to western @ 2pm.. either dinner with cds western fellas.. out with them after?? or shopping in states with jo, sam & their friends
saturday: out with jo and sam.. man i missing them.. haven't seem sammi since summer
sunday: out with jo and sam... train back to the ghetto at 7pm

itll be fun :)
fun i desperately need..
i'll take pics and load later

Happy 19th Birthday to Me!!!!!

i have this new blog thing.. its just a place for me to randomly pictures.. things i'm feeling.. things i'm missing.. and wut not.

My Life Thru Visuals


basically its a photo blog...

Flutters & Brows again 

Flutter 

Flutters & Brows 

Countdown!!!!!!

5 days!!! wee!! i'm so excited..

5 days till:

1) i'm legal to drink
2) i'm legal to buy cigarettes
3) i'm legal to gamble in casinos
4) i'm legal to go clubbing..
5) no more worrying about using fake id
6) my 1st legal hangover in windsor

6 days till:

1) my 1st legal hangover in t.o
2) going shopping for winter gear

12 days till:

1) my 1st legal drinking esponage @ western
2) my 1st legal hangover in western
3) a good weekend.. courtesy of jo & sam
4) my tattoo!!! wee... i'm so excited about this.. yet freaked.. its gonna hurt.. and i'm scared of pain.. but thats ok.. i'll have to deal

but unfortanetly... b4 i get to do all of these things.. i gotta deal with a test on friday!!! the one day of importance!! a test!!! boo urns!! it better not spoil my day!!

enuf with the whole lovey dovey backgrounds... i'm so past that now..
thought i'd go back to my own and only original love.. of jay chou.. ha!

surprisingly .. he looks pretty good in the pic.. thats pretty odd.. jay is not exactly a good lookin fella... but he's very "cool".. "yau ying"..

i luv his musik and his image matches that of it..
so yeah..
enjoy

so i'm sitting here at 3:22 AM ... unable to sleep.. just like every other night this week.. well except for last nite...

i dunno even kno y this whole insomnia thing is.. its not like i'm really busy or anything..

every night i find myself @ the same place... wanting to fall asleep b/c my body physically is tired.. i'm yawning.. and my eyes are starting to shut..so i change and get ready for bed.. i'd lie in my bed for 30-45 mins w/o no avail.. not being able to sleep.. i've tried so many different things too.. more blankets.. less blankets.. heat.. no heat.. music.. no music.. lights.. no lights.. warm milk.. warm tea.. lots of different things.. even sleeping pills.. and i'm still stuck..
i dun end up being able to fall asleep usually till like 4am..

man..major suckage.. i wanna sleep.. i have early classes that i actually have to go to.. and i can never wake up for them.. i sleep rite thru my alarm clocks.. and i have 4!!!!!! 4 different ones that go off in 5 minute intervals... I DUNT HEAR ANY!!!!!!

i need to go see a doctor or something..


and then i set my clock to wake up at say like

so it ends up.. i HAFTA get a new cell phone..

my motorola c350 decided to break down on me.. wont even turn on.. went to ask rogers..
my warranty is over.. so

i have 4 options...

1) get it fixed.. $25 labour fee just to see whats wrong with it.. plus like $50 -$100 to get it actually fixe

2) cancel service.. $200

3) preupgrade.. $100 to upgrade.. plus $27-$87 to buy the phone

4) buy a new cell phone on my own and use my sim card..

now the first 3 options make no sense to do.. so #4 it is..

i now need to find a good cell to actually buy w/o having to spend too much $.. i'm definetly low rite now.. i need a job.. but nobody wants to hire me.. :(


all the ones that i wanted are too expensive

anybody got any cell phone suggestions for me??

aah.. my week's been going good so far.. yeah

parents came to visit.. then got some extra $$$
went shopping yesterday.. bought new jeans.. new sweater.. aah and best of all

"NEW FOSSIL WATCH!"
mad cheap too.. only like $45
yeah!!

went & bought aimee's 20th b-day present.. as well as finish off felicity's 17th b-day present.. kinda a lil late. woops

on the bad side.. boohoo.. i can't seem to find my reciept. i cant get my MD fixed.. urgh

and its gonna cost $60 just to bring my cell phone in to see what's wrong with it.. and then i'll prolly cost more to fix it.. so annoying...

but anyhow.. been a good week so far..
have 1 midterm, 1proposal, 1 test due this week.. not too bad

aaah!!! its so nice to have visitors!!! unexpected ones tooo!!!!! yeah


i luv my mommi & daddi

i'd had a good saturday so far.. woke up..went to worship pratice.. went home.. had rehearsal with accompanist.. went home..
was just gonna check with my dad about $ for nov.. so i called him.. and they said they're almost here..

almost here?? huh?? turns out.. they decided to make a surprise trip here!! weee!!! i'd previously email them cuz my monitor was going crazy.. making really high pitched annoying sounds.. so i was gonna go home and buy a new home during b-day weekend.. hehe no need now..

they went and bought me one already!! yeah

they bought food for me tooo!! my fav.. Sweet and sour pork!! wontons!!! weee

i hadn't seen my mommi in SOOOO long.. since august 31!!!!

so we spent some quality chatting time .. while my daddi slept.. hehe.. long 4 hr drive..

then grocery shopping!!! yeah.. me no pay for groceries for next week!!! yeah!!!

then dinner.. woohoo.. free food and no cooking!! even better

oh to top it all off.. early b-day present from HK..

1. Burberry scarf!!! i luv my auntie 3
2. Shu Uemaru makeup.. i luv my auntie jenny
3. Perfume.. woohoo
4. $$$ ... who can ever have too much?? no one.. especially not me!!

so as u can see.. my avg saturday.. has just become an AMAZING saturday!!! i just hope this continues for the rest of the day...

something that made my day

I can't wait till 2005 and INITIAL D comes out!!!

check this out..

Initial D

Jay Chou
Edison Chen
Shawn Yue
Jordan Chan

4 of my fav singers/actors in the same movie!! how great will that be!!

in regards to dealing with things.. how long is considered too long?
i mean dealing with ppl, relationships... moving on with ppl.. trying to forget about a previous relationship or things like that.. is 2 months too long a time, too short a time or about rite?? i think that 2 months is a rather long time.. and i think that its more than sufficient to deal.. especially if you don't see or talk to the person.. and u just move on.. am i so wrong to think that??

i kno ur reading this.. so pleaz move on... its been a while..and im flattered that u feel that its worth contemplating.. but as we've talked about b4... i've made my decision..please respect that..i thought u had done so too..but i guess u haven't..i'm sorry again for this.. i didn't want it to be like this.. i really didn't.. but things wont get better b/w us unless we both move on...

and in regards to the small world thing

one equation:

best friend + ex-bf = engaged

best friend who i've known since i was 4 who lives on other side of world.. meets ex bf who i dated for a year on some website.. and one two three BOOM and they're engaged.. haha.. funny eh??

Thought for the day

The World Really is THAT SMALL!!!

explain later..

That Time of the Year is coming Again!!
what time u ask?? well let me tell u.. in 4 weeks and a day.. comes the big 19.. and by request... i've been asked to put up the yearly list.. so here we go

1. I want a new cell phone.. here are the kewlest ones i've seen
SONY ERICSSON S700c
SONY ERICSSON K00i
SONY DoCoMo SO505i

MOTOROLA RAZV3

NOKIA 6260 FLIP

NOKIA 7270 FLIP

NOKIA 7610

2. some girly things
lil party dress
another party dress
pretty skirt
Pretty Earrings
Cuff

3. some winter gear
Roxy Top
Lilu Top
Hurley Sweatshirt
O'Neil Sweatshirt
Roxy Sweatshirt
nice top
nice sweater top
Silk Rose Top
Fancy Jacket
Scarf
Another Pretty Scarf
Cute Bag
Cute Clutch
Shoes

4. Some Summer Gear
Roxy Swim
Roxy Swim
Billabong Shorts
O'Neill Shorts

5.Home Stuff
Bedding Gear
MOre Bedding Gear
Funky Lights

6. New Digital Camera

7. New MD

8. New Media Player

9. Shoes

Pretty Shoes
Pretty shoes (bottom row, middle)
Dressy Boots (Bottom left)
Girly Shoes
More Shoes
more shoes (in the pink croc)
high heeled boots

Strappy Heel

Pretty Shoe

Jimmy Choo (2nd Row, 1st)

Jimmy Choo (2nd Row, 2nd)

10. Watch

Fossil

Another Fossil

3rd Fossil

Here comes a 4th

MUCH NEEDED RELAXATION TOOL

MY UTMOST DESIRE

so yeah..thats wut i desire.. haha.. i'd be surprised if i even got 1/4 of the stuff mentioned.. hehe

That Time of the Year is coming Again!!

what time u ask?? well let me tell u.. in 4 weeks and a day.. comes the big 19.. and by request... i've been asked to put up the yearly list.. so here we go

1. I want a new cell phone.. here are some choices

SONY ERICSSON S700c

SONY ERICSSON K00i

SONY DoCoMo SO505i

2. some party things

lil party dress

another party dress

Pretty Shoes

pretty skirt

Pretty Earrings

Cuff

3. some winter gear

Roxy Top

Lilu Top

Hurley Sweatshirt

O'Neil Sweatshirt

Roxy Sweatshirt

nice top

nice sweater top

Silk Rose Top

Fancy Jacket

Scarf

Another Pretty Scarf

Cute Bag

Cute Clutch

Shoes

4. Some Summer Gear

Roxy Swim

Roxy Swim

Billabong Shorts

O'Neill Shorts

5.Home Stuff

Bedding Gear

MOre Bedding Gear

Funky Lights

6. New Digical Camera

7. New MD

8. New Media Player

this is tentative.. more to be added..

thanksgiving weekend.. so i did end up goign home regardless of all the diff problems that were arising..

and i'm glad i did go home.. it was loads of fun.. i missed home... and i missed ppl.. most ppl i hadn't seen in SOOO long.. since beggining of summer...

Friday:
-took train home.. saw jon cheung on the train.. hehe...
-took ttc with him, and friend from windsor from union up to finch
-got picked up.. went to JAP food with jo.. thanx again for picking me up jo
-went back to mcbc.. hung out for a lil while.. went home
-spent the rest of the nite.. watching tv with my daddie.. hehe :P

Saturday
-woke up nice n early..helped my dad with some garden work
-quality 'yum cha' with my dad
-went DT to get my English Horn appraised
-went over to D's .. nice ride in the hummer.. reminds me of rides to "harveys"
-Dave & Busters.. wowo.. lots of fun.. good dinner. good midway games.. man i missed seeing ppl .. i hadn't seen ppl in like a year!!! aaw.. jason and krystle.. haven't seen them in like 2 years!! was great catching up..
-icecream w/D & frankie.. wow.. i missed the quality chats... ha.. we sat for so long.. they were closing up when we left. like 2 hours!!! aaa!!! so kewl.. mad missing that..
-timmies .. for some more quality chatting.. another hour or so.. i can't wait till i make the "Krystle and Desiree" road trip.. mad quality bonding @ western..
-got home @ like 3am.. hehe.. mad craving for wendy's on the way home.. dun ask me why
surprised its still open at 2ish in the morning??
-watched more TV with daddie.. till like 4ish

Sunday
-haha.. definetly didn't wait up early that day.. 2PM!!! wooo.. thats great..
-sorrie mcbc'ers i wanted to come see u guys.. just really couldn't wake up in time..
-went down to First Markham.. lunch with some Fobbers.. bought some CDS..
-went home to study.. yes yes.. me stdy... voluntarily too!! wowo!!!
-went to dinner w/Dad and bunch of mom's friends.. well actually her best friends from like 30 yrs ago... mad kewl.. one flew from England for a trip
-went to one of their houses.. hung out with Jovita for a while.. mad yummi desserts..man.. mad talks.. i've known u for so long!!! since we were born.. literally... haha.. all our lives

Monday
-woke up around 12ish
-drove around looking for places to eat.. my fridge was completely empty.. man .. my house cannot survive w/o my mom
-finally licks.. yummi chicken fingers
-4 hours of grass cutting.. my back yard is so annoyign!!!
-went to dad's office.. waited for him to fix my pants
-715 train back to windsor.. man i hate via rail.. they can never arrive on time.. schedule arrive 11:01pm.. didn't actually get back till 11:4000 somethin

and that was the end of my thanksgiving weekend..did some quality bonding.. got to chat with some good friends. overally.. id say this thanskgiving was definetly good..
now i can't wait till b-day.. WESTERN here i come!!!

How to make a Sindy

Ingredients: 1 part success 5 parts humour 1 part beauty

Method: Layer ingredientes in a shot glass. Add a little lovability if desired!

wow.. as oct slowly starts to unravel.. i just realized how soon november is.. and that means.. wee!!! 19th birthday!!!
wooho.. i'm finally legal to go do some stuff..
and that means.. drinking.. clubbing.. smoking.. wutever else..


i haven't really put my thought into what it actually means to be 19? aside from being able to do those things.. its not like i haven't done them b4..

being 19 doesn't really mean much anymore.. aside from i'm another year closer to reaching the 2 decade mark..

wow that would make me just realy old now wouldnt it??

aaah.. thanksgiving is coming up soon.. i'm goign home soon.. woohoo.. man .. for the first time ever since going away to uni.. i actually missed home.. i really wanna go home.. really badly...

why?

1) i haven't seen my mom since last august.. cuz she's still in hk.. haven't even spoken to her that often either..

2) its incredibly boring here.... SO BORING!!!

3) i hate it here.. HATE it.. i TELL you.. HATE it..so much.. that i'm highly considering switching/transfering outta here by next sept

4) i want homemade food.. man i suck at cooking when i hafta clean up after myself..for those who know me.. i'm the biggest slob ever.. especially when it comes to food..a t home.. i cook good and make yummy food but make a big mess.. but my mommy cleans it.. here?? i hafta clean it myself.. my housemates aren't gonna do it for me.. rite?

5) i realized i left so much stuff behind.. i didn't bring in with me.. stupid me

a) adaptor for my keyboard.. what good is a keyboard if u can't play it?
b) rice cooker?? ha.. what good is rice if u can't cook anything other than congee??
c) winter clothes.. man its startin to get cold in here.
d) more dvds & vcds.. so bored w/nothing to do in here..
e) more cups.. i'm a klutz and already broke one.. boohoo.. i miss my Coca-Cola cup.. :'(

NO!!!!!!!!!

jay chou is going to have a concert again in hk!!!! and its rite by my b-day too!!! so not far!!! no.. it happens every 2 years.. every single time.. couldn't he just for once come to canada instead of hk??? :'(
i would so go to his concert anywhere in canada.. actually even in north america..

or even..couldn't he have his concerts earlier in the year?? that way i'm in hk when he has his concerts?


waaaaa!!! boohoo...

Thank You but Yet I'm Sorry..What I Mean To Say Is..

Thank you for the rides..
the smiles..
the laughter...
the joy..

Thank you for the kisses..
the hugs..
the tender loving care..

Thank you for seeing in me what others could not..
for believing in me when I didn't believe myself..
for your crying shoulder

but yet..

I'm sorry that things had to end..
sorry things didn't go as planned..
sorry that you and i both feel the way we do..

i'm sorry that things couldn't be different..
sorry that we're apart..
sorry that distance separates us..

i wish i could have had better choices..
wish the circumstances were different..
wish that an ocean didn't stand between us

what i mean is..
i'm forever grateful for the 2 months we had..
though things were against us.. u stuck with me
i thank you for the moments we shared.. they will never leave me..
i hope that perhaps in another lifetime, we can share what we have experienced with each other.. once more..

From my heart to yours
sindy

2 weeks Deprived!!!!!

man.. oh man.. 2 weeks deprived of internet.. hardcore!! hence the lack of bloggin..

so i've officially moved into my new place.. pretty kewl.. i'll put my web cam pics up once i get my better internet connection.. rite now i'm using dial up.. yes yes.. ghetto dial up.. but not for too long..hopefully.

skewl has started..back to the good ol' routine.. enough with the boring stuff...

hongkong... aaah.. it was a long but good 2 1/2 months.. i could do w/o the annoying kindergarten kids.. but thast all part of it i guess.. i had some really sweet cutie kds... but i had some really really annoying kids!!!

herbert.. jason.. ryan.. ugh

the rest of hk was pretty fun.. lots of shopping.. clothes.. cds.. movies.. lots of useless stuff too.. hehe

lots happened in hk.. i'll definetly miss hk..miss ppl.. miss some 'special moments'...

wow.. its been a while..

i'm done teaching.. omg.. kids in hk.. are such incredible brats!! haha.. i wanna like wring their necks... aaah!! definetly glad i'm done.. otherwise.. you'd see my name under accused of murder in the hk papers

hk has been fun even still.. especialyl yesterday.. i went out boating with my cousins.. wakeboarding.. banana boat.. swimming.. mad funz.. wee1!!

i have 8 days left in hk...

first 3 days.. i have to go to "Lam Ah Island"... with my family.. family resort vacation..
then next 5 days.. i have to finish all my shopping.. cds.. dvds.. clothes.. shoes.. wutever else needs to be bought..

then i'm back to t.o

pack all the stuff needed to bring into my new place in windsor.. then sept 4 or 5.. into windsor i go..



And that will be the end of my summer vacation.. boo hoo

:'(

fuckin nosebleed of the century!!! shit!!! 1 1/2 hrs non stop!!! fuck...i've never had that bad of a nosebleed b4...made me miss work.. shit!

Typhoon #8

 

My very first typhoon #8!! ha.. i'm such a loser.. its raining and pouring outside...i wanna go outside and see what its like.. but relatives said its dddddangerous!!!

 

:)

 

i'm so excited cuz its a typhoon.. every time i'm back.. there is never one.. and i can't even remember if i went thru one during my 4 years in hk ... prolly.. but i can't remember what it was like..

 

so anyhow... hk has been fun so far.... a few friends are back.. more coming.. yeah :)

 

gone and done a lil bit of shopping.. mainly for work.. cuz i cant look too shabby being a teacher and all. gotta look older..

 

i still got a lot more to do.. hey .. thats what the whole job thing is for.. how else can i afford to buy so much stuff.. I'm the biggest SHOP-A-HOLIC ever!!!!

 

oh big ups!!i apparently got a pay raise for the job!!! and longer hours too!! exactly what i was hoping for!!yeah!!!

 

I'm teaching

 

P.6(gr.6) english

MON-FRI 10AM-12PM

$170 HK /hr

4 weeks

$6800 HK total

 

MON-FRI 1-3PM

$150 HK/hr

4 Weeks

$6000 HK total

 

Kindergarten Phonics

MON-FRI 12-1PM

$200 HK/hr

5 Weeks

$5000 total

 

yeah!! i luv this  being foreign thing!!! its so much better than working minimum wage @ wonderland!!! man.. never working @ wonderland again!!! FrieD my hair!!!! Burnt my Skin!!! Minimum wage!!! URgh!!

 

 

yeah ...i luv hk!!! WEEE!! i am definetly coming back again next year!!! i have accumulated enough points for a free round-trip trip to HK!!! so that means next summer i'm back!! and then i usually come back every 2 years with family!!! sweetness!!!

 

oh well.. storm is starting to dye out a lil.. maybe i'll go out..

 

lates

 

 

aah..hong kong ....so incrediby hot!!! 38 degrees!! aah!!! but it feels like its like 40 something..cuz itsso sticky!!!i'm gonna boil!!!

i dun start skewl till the 18th...and i can't seem to find a second job..which i really want:(
so now i'm just bummmin at home all day watchin tv..which i'm not exactly complaining about..but it gets boring after the first week...

i moved to happy valley the other day..

i'm living with my cousins there.. its so kewl.. so many celebrity live on this part of HK.. i saw Edmund Leung and his gf the other day at Pacific Coffee...haa.. so kewl!!! i wanted his autograph so bad but didn't wanna go botherthem..

i wanna see who else i will meet b4 the end of summer.. :)

BIG UPS!!!! my cousin knows this guy who works at Sony MUSIC in hk..and apparently Jay Chou is coming for some record business stuff later in july.. my cous say herfriend can bring us in to meethim!!!! HOW GREAT IS THAT??????

gtg....pick up some stuff..

lates

My atlantic trip....


wee.. very long 9 days.. but fun 10 days...

first day: 8 hr drive to Grand Falls, New brunswick .. look at the falls.. sleep

second day: drive to Cavendish in PEI.. wee~!! beaches!! i luv pretty white sand on beaches... went to Anne of Green Gables museum.. had COWS icecream!! so good!!! Lobster din din..wee!! sleep

third day: Cavendish... had McLobster @ Charlettetown McDonalds.. visited downtown Charlettetown.. visited U of PEI.. Lobster, Mussels and CLam din din.. yummi.. so frsh!!

fourth day: Ferry from PEI to Caribou Nova Scotia.. Drive to Cape Breton Island... visited Cape Smokey.. really high cliff!!! wee.. Seafood Din Din.. late night walk..

fifth day: Biggest Dissapointment.. went Whale Watching.. didnt see a single whale.. boo hoo.. drove to Moncton.. visited some look out points on the way...

sixth day: Hopewell rocks.. saw the tides.. very kewl.. world's longest covered bridge.. rather boring.. but still kewl.. went to this really cool lighthouse..

seventh day: drove to Quebec City.. visited the Citadel.. Old Quebec City.. all the works...

eight day: walk around the promenade in quebec.. shopping mall..

and thats my trip...

in aprox 12 hours.. i'm off to HK>. my plane leaves at like 10 somethin.. long 19h30m... I swear i'm gonna cry!!!!

at least i'm not by myself which is good...

but yeah.. I"m off.. more packing and wut not...

wee... so i'm almost outta here.. first to the atlantic provinces till the 19th.. then HK on the 22nd!!!! WEE!! This HK trip will be great!!!

Sammi, Danielle, and Guy will be there too.. not so borign!!! YES!!! plus a few friends from windsor!! sweetness.. plus ... 2 jobs!! Oh yeah!!!

I'm completely broke so 2 jobs is great!! one's teaching english.. and the other is like music playgroups at a music skewl in hk..

My Musik Box

great eh??

can't wait..

After HK is Vancouver to see all my buds.. from long ago.. haha..friends from when i was 8... wee!!! this trip should be good

well yeha.. if anybody needs me to buy stuff for them in hk.. just email me.. i'll try my best..


my life will be very excitign while in hk.. i hope.. :P so tune in..

wow wow.. been home for a while.. havne't blogged in a while either...

well life @ home is just like normal.. and by that i mean....


BORING
BORING
BORING!!!!

nothing to do much.. since some ppl have to work and some ppl have skewl and wut not..

i on the other hand.. have nothing to do.. was suppose to go volunteer at mon sheong.. but that didn't happen... now all i do everyday is sit at home..and attempt to clean my room.. ha.. thats never gonna happen... it will be a pig sty forever!!!!! *evil laugh*

so.. rite now.. i'm just countin down the days till i leave for ottawa.. then for the east...and then hk.. and then vancouver.. and back...



21 days till i leave for ottawa
23 days till Miranda graduates from UNI!!!! YEAH!!!!
24 days till I go East to Halifax, New Brunswick, Nova Scotia, and PEI
33 days till I come back back out East
35 days till I leave for HK
38 days till I go to GongZhou
48 days later.. I'm back in HK
55 days later.. I start teaching in HK
85 days later.. I leave HK for Vancouver
89 days later.. I'm back from HK!!!


thats my summer for ya..

shout out from here in the ghetto...


yes yes .. i'm back again.. unfortanetly...

i'm here till may 1st.. then i'm gone!!! wee!!! gone till sept!!! sweetness!!

by the time i get back.. everybody will be back.. so mad hanging out!! mad get togethers!!! weee!! i haven't seen some ppl

in so long

:)

but yeah.. not much to say.. cuz windsor is boring.. so lates

wow... 1st year of uni passed by really quickly...

as i sit here in my room.. amongst my boxes of stuff.. waiting for the 'rents to come get me....

i think back on this year..

its been lots of fun for most of the year.. it passed by really quickly tho..


i kinda wish i worked harder on some courses tho.. and i kinda wish i first approached the whole university thing differently.. some many problems arose in the beggining b/c of my attitude and perspective of everything..

i kinda wish i didn't make a lot of the stupid mistakes that i made this year.. i mean.. some in regards to school.. some in regards to people.. some in regards to life in general.. but i guess thats also a part of life.. u make mistakes .. and u learn from them.. and try not to make them again...

on a better note

i think i've grown up.. i look at things differently.. and more carefully now.. i put more thought into a lot of things now..

i've also actually learned a lot.. things that actually matter and i WILL remember in the summer .. and years from now.. hehe.. unlike high skewl.. where i forgot everything like 3 days after summer vacation started.. ha..

ive improved on my playing so much!!! i went from being an alrite playa.. to being much better.. i mean.. theres still lots more i need to learn to do.. and improve on.. but i'm slowly getting there.. YEAH :)

i had my 2nd jury yesterday.. and i think it went really well!!! my teacher and my accompanist were amazed at how well it went.. and during the jury.. jamie and trevor.. the flute and clarinet profs... smiled at me.. thats a good sign rite???

at the woodwind mastercalls last last sunday.. the 4th ... they commented on how my sound was so much clearer.. my tonality was better.. and they said i had improved greatly.. and i improved even more so from that on.. so yeah me..

now i just have to keep on going.. :)

but yeah

psyc exam and jury tommorow..


scared shitless!!!

THANK GOODNESS!!!

i was stressing out b4 about not having a place to say next year.. NOT ANYMORE!! i'm living on Randolph!!!

with a friend of mine.. sweetness!!! nice big closet.. mad cheapness!!!

oh.. here it comes..

all inclusive

$300 a month!!!! OOOOOOHHHH!!!!!

soo nice!!! the room is a good size too.. sweetnes!s!!!

here comes a week of true hecticness & stress.. 6 exams in 4 days!!! AAAAH!!!!!

monday.. mad study for exams and pratice for jury
tuesday.. mad study and praticing
wednesday... 830 music therapy exam
.... 12noon Basic skills exam
thursday.. mad study for psyc and pratice for jury
friday... 2:15 jury!! aah!!
.... 4 Psyc Exam
.. pack to go home!!!
saturday.. 830 Theory Exam!!!
.. I'm going home!! wee!!!!


can't wait!!!

oh.. on a betta note!!


MAD PROPS TO TIFF!!!

she's the greatest.. unexpected package!! weee!!!!


GOOD LUCK @ NATIONALS!!!! You'll ROCK!!!

kno wut incredibly suxs?? and hurts like hell too??

having a cyst on ur neck!!! i apparently have one.. and its growing!!!! like big!! Urgh!! hurts like hell.. its apparently infected.. or so the doctor says.. its grown to be like a whole inch big and its stickin out like a whole cm out of my skin.. gross!!!!!

it hurts.. its hard and its like pushin on my nerves or something.. cuz my right side of my neck and face is starting to feel numb.. urgh..

stupid medication that the doc at student med center isn't helpin either.... its growin more and bigger now than b4 i had the meds.. aaah!!

oh .. and on top of that stupid lumb thing... i have to get a blood test done for stupid iron deficiency and mono too.. dun kno why i'm always tired.. and constantly out of breath..

i hate blood tests!!! i hate anythign to do with needles.. i freaked out when they had to use a needle to pierce my cartilage.. jo knows.. i started to freak out..

no kewl .. definetly not clue.. what could be worse..

hav a humongous lump on my neck.. hurts like hell.. my right side of face and neck is numb.. and i have to get blood test.. urgh.. so definetly not kewl.. :(

:'(

i changed my format today.. pretty lil pinkness!!
woohoo
my sudden fascination with pink definetely reflects :)
haha
not much to say rite now.. have an exam in 1 1/2hrs.. haven't started studying.. so yeah.. study cram time..

where does all my time go now a days.. playing stupid games..

aaah.. i need to stop playing stupid games on yahoo...

stupid game called rocket mania.. i play it like 24/7

i dun even kno why.. its not like its a very stimulating game or anything...

ive gone up to like level 30... i'm like the master of elements or something like that.. aaah!! gotta stop!!!!

anyone kno how to block sites off?? like certain sites?? maybe i can block this site or something... AAAAH!!!!!!!

and oh.. zuma~!!! stupid zuma.. its such a fun game.. but i can never stop!!! AAAAH!!!!

to reply on what cy said...

cy's blog

its really true.. how often do we brush by homeless people when we go downtown??? how often do we go and pray for the sick and in trouble?? the poor??

why is it that we only seem to care when someone tell us to care?? why don't we care about all the other missing children out there?? or the hungry children?? the orphans?? why do we only seem to care about one??

i mean.. yes.. its sad what happened to cecilia... it truly is.. this shouldn't be happening...

but... it is really sad how we all... focus on ourselves and our family and friends ALL the time.. we never seem to care about anybody or anything else...

why can't we open our eyes and see the world.. not the image that everything seems to give off.. but the REAL world!!! the world filled with sadness, loneliness, disease, hatred..

we need to open our eyes and see it for ourselves..


thanx cy for the wake up..

i'm going home this weekend.. the diff from usual is :

1) i'm not going for fun!!!!

i have to go to laurier for an audition.. scared shitless for it rite now..... i have to get it.. i need the summer course credit.. boo urns

2) grammy is home!!!

which automaticaly means good fun!!! sweetness!!!hmm.. i should make a list of what to get her to make for me to bring back.. i luv my grammy

3) i definetly need to go home..

if i say here in the ghetto any longer i swear i'm gonna go psycho!!!!

aah :) on a brighter side.. i had previously mentioned that teaching job in hk... its great!! i'm so in debt and that job is so gonna get me out of it!!!!! u wouldn't think teaching overseas can be that great.. but

1) kids!! i luv them!!
2) hong kong!!! i luv it there too
3) experience.. i definetly need it
4) the pay!!! the greatest thing of all!!! $250-$280 HK an hour!! 2-4 hours a day.. 5 days a week.. for 5 weeks.. that means about $2500-$5600 CAD for the month of august plus a week in july!!! thats amazing!!! definetly need that money

i owe my sister money, my parents money, VISA, MASTERCARD, and most of all.. a big amount to my grammy.. for the damn english horn...

anyhow.. enuf ranting for nwo..

is it just me.. or is life harder and harder to life each and every day??

i find that most definetly.. and it pisses me off!!!

its up to the point where i dun even really care about anything anymore..

school .. music... work.. i dun really give a damn anymore..

aaah.. i hate this looking for a place to live stuff.. so confusing.. u can never find the perfect place.. i found one place.. it was really good.. close.. nice apartment.. pretty big for one bedroom.. really cheap.. like $450 all inclusive.. hydro and cable too.. only thing to pay for is internet.. amazing.. balcony too.. best thing!!!

NICE BIG CLOSET!!!

hehe.. all my clothes.. ha!

stupid thing is.. the guy's lease thing.. is for 12 months.. and i am not going to be here from may to august.. and i dun feel like paying $450 each months.. thats like $2000 bucks!!!! no way!!! and i can't sublet it.. the guy wont let me.. if i could sublet it.. i would.. and im pretty sure someone would take it... the place is amazing.. URGH!!!!

now i gotta keep lookin.. so far.. only a few places look good.. the best is a loft downtown.. its pretty good.. but kinda far.. gotta keep looking....

Countdown to the rest of the semester

2 days till: my 2nd psyc midterm
11 days till: Music Therapy Student Association Conference
13 days till: Session Planning Assignment
22 days till: Song Leading Assignment
25 days till: Wind Ensemble "Lord of the Rings" Concert = 3pm @ Capitol
29 days till: Service Learning Presentation
35 days till: My Basic Skills Final Exam @ 12pm
: My Music Therapy Final Exam@ 830am
37 days till: Oboe Jury @ 2:15 pm
: Psyc Final Exam @4pm
38 days till: Theory Final Exam
: I move out of Residence
47 days till: Wind Ensemble Tour = 1 whole week
78 days till: WLU Windfest Chamber Music Workshop = 20 days
99 days till: I board my plane to HK

100 days till: I"M in HK!!!!

122 days till: I start teaching English in HK

142 days till: I go to VANCOUVER!!! visit all my buds!!

146 days till: I return to Toronto from Vancouver

153 days till: 2nd year of uni begins!!!!!!

BLUE You give your love and friendship unconditionaly. You enjoy long, thoughtful conversations rich in philosophy and spirituality. You are very loyal and intuitive. Find out your color at Quiz Me!

is it really that hard to get someone out of ur head??

i mean.. ive never really had that big of a problem with it.. ever

and it took me at the most 1 month?? i guess.. i dun really even kno for sure.. never kept track...

but ... i find it harder & harder to forget...

reading week.. i dreaded going back.. cuz i'd have to see you.. and even tho i knew seeing you would help me get thru it..the feelings go away.. i still didn't want to.. and i tried my hardest to avoid confrontation..

and i guess my hard work paid off.. cuz i never did see you.. for many reasons.. laziness.. weather.. to name a few...

instead of seeing u for the short week.. i ended up talking to u .. more often than i have in the last 3 4 weeks.. and i guess that mite be the problem.. without having heard from u.. or seen u... for such a long time..i kinda started to forget about u..

and then the sudden dreading of having to see u set in.. and all of a sudden talking to u once again.. it bought the feelings back out..

i told myself to forget.. to not put some thought into it..b/c i knew there was nothing there.. nothing to beginning with.. and nothign there now...

but why couldn't i get u out of my head?

as i sit here.. trying to figure out my thoughts.. i dun even know where we are.. friends?? more than friends?? or not even friends??

i mean .. we use to be friends.. but our relationship has sorta gone in the ditch.. dun talk so much anymore.. dun hang out no more..so where are we??

i dun even kno where exactly i stand in this whole situation.. where do i want to be?? do i want to move on?? do i want to stay where i am??

i wish i knew.. that way.. i wouldn't have to think about it..

i can pretty much sum up how stupid i am.. in one sentence.

i forgot that i had a midterm and an assignment due this week!!!!


completely forgot!!! like completely!!! didn't no anythign all reading week.. and now

am SUFFERING!!!!!

aaah!!!!

4 hours of sleep!! woohoo.. i'm gonna die b4 the end of this week..

wish me luck everybody!!

aah.. my reading week has passed by really quickly..

today is saturday already..

i'm going in tommorow.. and honestly ...

i haven't done much this week.. really i haven't...

friday: went to london to get jo.. and then took train back home

saturday: hung out at home for the day.. picked up sammie and fre...went to pneumatos.. and then went to congee wong with ppl afterwards

sunday: went to jap food with jo and cyrus

monday: can't remember what i did this day.. if i even did anythign..

tuesday: hung out at home.. went to jo's.. watched Lost in Translation with her, sam, si, and some guy named enoch

wednesday: went down to baycrest for my observation.. got jo.. went shopping down on queen street.. got some oboe/EH stuff...and then pj's house for some ladies chat thing with betty

my observation.. was amazing! just plain amazing!!

thursday: went to lunch with bunch of cds'ers... shay.. frankie.. rogers.. elise.. d.. james and gf.. then back to cds.. visited.. sat in for band.. haha.. i'm a loser.. yes.. i kno

friday: went with mom to go to chiro's... ouchy... i forgot how much it hurt.. picked up brother.. went to jo's.. we WERE suppose to go see the passion.. but jo and si and jer.. quickly reminded how i didn't like to hang out with them.. so unorganized.. and so ma fan.... Urgh!!! but i still luv them... so then went to jap food with mom and bro and dad.. yummi.. :P and then desserts.. woohoo..

sat: today.. chillin out with d.. lunch and movie and something like that

sun: wake up.. pack.. lunch.. leave


and that will be the end of my reading week.. really haven't done much..

all i can say is this:



I'm HOMe!!


luving it!!!

My inner child is ten years old!

The adult world is pretty irrelevant to me. Whether
I'm off on my bicycle (or pony) exploring, lost
in a good book, or giggling with my best
friend, I live in a world apart, one full of
adventure and wonder and other stuff adults
don't understand.


How Old is Your Inner Child?
brought to you by Quizilla

3 days
till i officially fail my theory midtem

i swear to god.. i dun kno anything that is on it.. urgh!!! and i dun get it.. i'm trying 2 catch up.. but dun get it!! URGH~!!!

Praise & Worship Nite

was really really good!!! even tho we didn't have much time to prep for it.. it was amazing.. at least i thought so.. well and a few other ppl too..

WE Concert

was amazing.. Trevor Pittman was OMG!!!!!! he played so amazingly!!! AAAH!!!! and the rest of the WE was amazing too!!!! yeah!!! even tho i screwed up one of my solos.. buts thats ok

Miranda??

didn't happen.. she didn't come down.. which totally suxed... but thats ok.. i can take my revenge on her when i go home for reading week!!!

Reading Week

i'm leaving on friday!!! FRIDAY!!!! so soon.. yet so far away.... :( can't wait!!!! can't wait!! Jap FOOD w/jo !!!!! Good Homemade chinese food!!!!! Movies!!! Hanging out with friends!! no Work!!! WOHOOO!!!

Theory Midterm
so utterly and completely screwed for that.. i have no idea what the heck i'm doing in theory.. this stupid choral harmony analysis crap.. aaah!!!!

thats all i gotta say.. short but straight to the point

Countdown:

1 day till: Praise & Worship Nite at WCBC
2 days till: Miranda comes to visit me in windsor
3 days till: U of Windsor Wind Ensemble Concert @ Capitol Theatre 3 pm
5 days till:I become a psyc research lab rat
8 days till: My Very 1st Music Therapy Observation!!! :) WEEE!!!
9 days till: Theory Midterm
: I go to London to pick up JO
: I go HOME!!!!
11 days till: Reading Week officially starts!!!
13 days till: My very first 2nd Music Therapy observation!!! :) WEEE!!
19 days till: my observation assignment is due
21 days till: my music therapy midterm
29 days till: my 2nd psyc midterm
62 days till: My Basic Skills Final Exam @ 12pm
: My Music Therapy Final Exam@ 830am
64 days till: Psyc Final Exam @4pm
65 days till: Theory Final Exam
: DONE FIRST YEAR!!!!

now as i look at the list.. my first year of uni is gonna be over really soon.. this year has gone by really really quickly.. i mean.. it was only a year ago.. that i started worrying about uni.. and whether i would get in or not.. and now.. aproximately 365 days later.. i'm sitting here.. about to finish my first year.. WOW!!! time goes by really quickly... and lots have happening in the time that has passed by

1)i'm no longer the boy-crazy .. boy-obsessed girl that i always was.. i mean... i still like guys.. dun get me wrong.. but it no longer a priority for me.. all thru high skewl.. i worried so much about bf's.. about whether i'd have one.. about whether he was the rite one.. about whether we should be together.. and every single lil thing u could associate with having a bf.. and i worried so much about it in hs... i dunno even kno why.. cuz as i look back.. i never had a single good relationship with any of them.. they all ended horrificly... and why did i spend so much on it.. when in the end.. it didn't make a difference.. so now..i'm concentrating on more importants things.. skewl.. friends.. family.. my future.. and if i meet a guy.. and things seem rite.. sure i'll take the opportunity.. but if there are no opportunities.. i'm ok with that too..

2)everybody seems to think that i've kinda matured.. even in the first 3 weeks of university.. when i first went home.. first thing Dez said to me.. was ur different.. uve matured.. no longer the cute kiddish lil Sindy.. and i dunno really if thats true.. i haven't noticed anything.....

3)spiritually... i've grown a bit.. a lil bit.. at least.. i'll actually go on sundays and friday.. w/o muttering and complaining..
there are still a lot of questions that need to be answered.. and problems to be solved.. but i'll get there eventually.. i hope.. this much is for sure.. i no longer repel the faith.. i no longer hate it.. i've acccepted it.. and will go from there

4) emotionally.. for me this year.. has been hard.. with everything around me.. changing.. and all my friends changing.. and the environment changing.. its been hard for me to keep up.... and i've often been in the background.. looking as everybody and everything changed.. and i didn't want that.. i really didn't.. i wanted things to be exactly the same.. and i couldn't bear to see it changed.. so many a times.. i found myself feeling lonely and in tears.. i didn't wanna grow up.. i didn't want to lose my friends.. i didn't want to change.. and I still dont.. but ive learned that no matter how much i cry or how much im not happy it.. things will change.. i just have to learn to accept and adapt.. thats all there is to do..

so i guess.. this year has passed by quickly.. but i've learned quite a # of things.. and i'm sure there is still lots more to learn.. before the end of this semester is over...