counting down the days... 25 more days till i'm home and 27 till christmas.....

sadly every time i start counting down, it seems like the days are farther and farther away. there's not much standing in the way of me and those 25 days: simply 2 exams and working. and i really do wish i had decided to go home early instead of picking up extra shifts, but i know its for the best for me to stay up here. this will probably be the first time i'm home for the holidays for such a short period of time. i hope i end up getting to hang out with everybody and see everybody before i come again because the next time i see them again will probably be thanksgiving 2009.

ive kind of got my rest of 2009 planned out already.. its quite busy and if it goes as planned, 2009-2010 will be my last year in canada for a while. i'll be back again in tbay come beginning of january.. school and work till reading week. going to montreal/tremblant. and then back to tbay for school/work and then exams. after exams i'm heading off to hk for the summer.. prolly gonna head straight for tbay after or stay in hk till mid sept, head to nyc for cousin's wedding and then back to tbay.. come christmas, i have no idea where i'll be.. as i will no longer have a home back in toronto. might stay in tbay, maybe go back to hk, might bum @ somebody's in toronto. finish the year and then head off to hong kong for good.. thats the plan at least for now.

a lot of it all rides on what i decide to do about school. i haven't quite decided if i wanna just do a B.Arts or a Hon.B.Arts in Music. i'd be done a whole lot quicker if i just did the B.Arts.. convo june 2010 or Hon.B.Arts in Music.. convo 2011/2012 depending... i don't know if i really wanna a music degree.. geeez here i go again.. i can never seem to decide what to do. irregardless of what degree i chose, i'll end up doing the same thing anyway. so the dilemna is whether i want to do an extra 2-3 yrs of school for a type of degree that i wont necessarily be using anyway, a type of degree that wouldn't particularily benefit or be of any more advantage.

so i don't know. i don't even know why exactly i'm ranting tonight at 1am. perhaps i'm jsut being like always and procastinating. god knows i should be studying for an exam i have on monday or even sleeping instead of bumming around watching tv, movies and surfing the net. oops

its coming up.. not as soon as i would like.. and its sad that this year i wont be home for it.. but hopefully i'll be doing something exciting up in tbay for it..

my birthday wishlist:

not that anybody is gonna buy any of these things.. but i like to make a list none the less...


Billabong Hoodie
Roxy Luggage Set
Roxy Shoes
Winter Boots
Coach Violet Clutch
Coach Magenta Carly
Coach Berry Wallet
Tattersall Bracelet
Coach Ring
Coach Ring
Leehom New CD - which my sister has preorder for me already!! yeah miranda...
Winter Boots in Moonlight Ivory
TNA Cowichan Sweater - my mommie bought this for me already .. how nice :P
Nikon Coolpix 10.1MP Digital Camera (P80)
MacBook . i thought i'd never say it.. but i've starting liking the mac
Sorel Winter Boots in Kettle.. cuz winter up here is freakin insane....


not much else to say.. i'm gonna go bake a cake now.. hmm.. chanterelle's chocolate souffle cake sounds good...

having a good prof really means everything. understanding means u don't hate the course as much. which for me means i don't skip class as often. i have realized i am not as dumb as i think i am. a prof that is able to explain things in a efficient and coherent way definitely helps a lot. i understand music theory a lot better this time around.. and as a result, i find myself not as bored in class, not as wanting to skip class.

on the topic of skipping class, to be honest, i'm still finding it hard to get my butt out the door and walk to class. especially when its monday morning, or its a night class. more so when its cold outside.

did i mention that its only like 10 degrees avg up here? complete with harsh winds, it really feels like winter has started up here. the wind up here is like 10-20km/h on a normal day. just this past weekend, it was -4 degrees at like 9am. it was excruciating to have to walk 10 mins to the bus stop, and then again for 10 mins from the bus stop to work.

i don't even want to start imagining what the winter up here will be like. according to the weather network,

january's temperatures range from -20 to -8 with winds of 15km/h and up to an avg of 43cm of snow. i think i might just turn into a snowman. complete with a big furry jacket, furry boots, and big furry hood.

i am definetly looking forward to going home to toronto this weekend, where the forecasted weather is suppose to be 14-19 degrees..

i'm glad to be goin back to toronto. i miss my chinese food.. i miss my sushi.. i miss my calbee potato chips :P there are no good places up here for chinese food, no chinese grocery market :(

only another 40 or so hours to go..

i have officially moved to thunder bay.. unpacked and everything..

despite the fact that its so far away from everything i know and everyone i know, its not actually too bad of a place..

its quite peaceful and beautiful here.. i have an awesome view from my room... my housemates are nice..

starting to think my choice to come was good...

evidence of such:

in a span of 4 hours, i managed to gain credit for all my past windsor credits, change majors, and basically complete 1.5 years of university.. HAHA.. sweet....

in the span of a day, i've completely unpacked, got my ISIC card, bus pass, applied for work study, applied for jobs, and started my readings... WT????

yes that is correct.. i've actually broken the book seal and started to read..

maybe, just maybe... i'll go to my first class tommorow :)

i am so confused..


about school
about life
about family
about friends
about the future
about work
about money.

for once, i'd like to make a decision, be sure of it, and then have nothing else in the world change so that it would stay correct. dream that's never going to come true.. yes i know.

it just really bugs me that no matter what i do, i always end up at the uncertainty, doubting stage.

when will i ever figure things out?